The Biggest Fan: Why Every Writer Needs Someone to Believe in Them

Writing is hard, it's often thankless, and it's full of rejection. 

Every. Single. Day. 

Rejection.

If you're a writer, you probably already know how important it is to have someone on your team--someone who believes in you.

Why?

Photo by fauxels

1. Motivation

Having someone believe in your writing gives you the confidence to get started and keep going, even when it's tough. Sometimes all you need is a little push, and this person is here for it.

2. Confidence

Knowing that someone out there thinks your work is worth reading can make a huge difference. They know you have what it takes, and they never hesitate to tell you. 

3. Feedback

An ardent supporter is someone to bounce around ideas with, making it easier to get feedback and constructive criticism. This becomes invaluable when developing your stories and craft.

4. Encouragement 

They push you to be better and help you reach your potential, cheering for you the entire way. This can mean the difference between getting published and giving up too soon.

***

Every writer has a story to tell, but not every writer has someone who believes in them. 

I won't go so far as to say that a support system is essential to a writer's success, but having someone in your corner through the discouragement and the vulnerability--when the rejections pour in--can be a huge motivator to keep at it.

So if you're a writer and there's someone in your life who fits this description, cherish them. 

If you're not a writer (and you stumbled across this post by accident) but there's a writer in your life, be that person for them. 

If you're a writer without a tribe, consider joining a writing group (in-person or online) and start building relationships with other writers who can be that system for you.

And if you're in need of a quick pick-me-up, feel free to drop me a line or tag me in a tweet.

I'm more than happy to be that person for you.

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~

Setting Goals that Work for You

When it comes to achieving our writing goals, motivation is key. But sometimes it's hard to stay motivated, especially when we're facing challenges. 

(I wrote an entire book on how to work past those challenges, btw.) 

With #NaNoWriMo coming up and thousands of writers making plans to sit down at the keyboard and pound out those words, I thought I'd post a few reminders about staying motivated and working toward your goals.

Photo by Engin Akyurt

1. Be realistic. 

It's important to set goals that are actually achievable. 

Yes, it's possible to write a book in 30 days. It's less likely this can be accomplished in a single weekend. Don't set yourself up for failure by demanding something of yourself that isn't attainable. Goals should be challenging but not impossible. 

2. Get an action plan together.

Once your goals are set, break them down into smaller steps. 

It's possible to write 50,000 words in a single month, but it means sitting down and writing 1,666 words every day for those 30 days. That might mean writing 833 words in the morning and 833 more words at night. Or it might mean writing 416 words every hour for four hours. 

Either way, having a plan of action will help you stay on track and focused on what you need to accomplish.

3. Take things one step at a time. 

Trying to do too much at once can be overwhelming and lead to discouragement. 

I've only been able to participate in NaNoWriMo one time many, many years ago. As much as I adore this idea and as hard as I cheer everyone else on, my work schedule just doesn't allow me much free time in November. I'd be more likely to sign up if it were in June or July. 

The point? Don't set a goal or make a plan that's going to tip your (already full) plate of responsibilities. If you can't write a novel in thirty days, why not extend your finish line through the month of December? Give yourself 60 days, instead. 

Only you know what you're capable of realistically accomplishing. 

Push yourself, but don't push yourself. That is, don't push yourself past your reasonable limit. :)

And above all:

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~ 

When You're Burning Out

Writer burnout is a very real thing, and I feel fairly confident in saying that it affects every writer at one point or another. 

"Burnout" is the physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion that leads to a decrease in productivity. Writer burnout happens when a writer finds themselves not feeling any sort of passion for their work. 

Photo by Sebastian Sørensen

Now, I love a good slow-burn romance, but a slow burnout? Not so much. A slow burnout looks a lot like sitting down and not getting any work done, or struggling to get words onto the page, or avoiding sitting down to work at all, and it will seriously affect our productivity if it's not addressed. 

Early signs of writer burnout include a lack of motivation to get to work or a lack of excitement about our current project. It looks a lot like a lack of energy that can leave us feeling depressed or irritable. We may even dread going to the page because we know the writing isn't going "well."  

But if we can learn to recognize burnout at the onset, we may be able to rest and recharge before it gets too severe. 

(We need your stories, so please don't throw in the towel just yet.)

The best way to figure out how to recharge your writing batteries is to take a step back from your work. Try to focus on something else for a few minutes, a few hours, or even a few days. It can be as simple as doing the dishes or straightening up your desk. You can try meditating or taking long walks outside. Personally, I use movies to recharge. (Hello, Netflix!)

If you feel like you're in a rut and still want to write (especially if you're on a deadline), try going somewhere that's not your usual writing environment. Instead of writing in bed, head to a local coffee shop. Instead of writing in the morning, write at night. 

If you're not on a deadline, change up your format or genre. Instead of writing romance, try a mystery. If you were working on a novel, turn your attention to a short story or a poem. If you write on a laptop, pull out a pen. 

It's a truth that bears repeating: writing is not always fun. There are good writing days and not-so-good writing days. 

On those not-so-good days, focus on the long game, the end game, and try to remember your "why." 

Think about the readers you want to connect with. Think about the characters you want them to relate to or the storyline that you'll use to pull them away from reality for a few hours. Think about all the ways you'd like to inspire them and the message you want to impart.

Most importantly, keep in mind that for everything there is a season.

There is a season for writing, and there is a season for resting, and taking periods to rest is just as beneficial to your writing practice as "sitting down to write every day."

In fact, it's one of the best ways to...

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~

On Rejection

Rejection is the universe's way of saying there's something better out there for us--that we're worth more than whatever this thing we are pursuing has to offer right now.

For writers, a rejection could mean there's a better publishing house, a better agent, a better journal, or even a better path than the one we're currently working toward.

Maybe we didn't place in that anthology contest, but there's a literary magazine we can submit to that will showcase our writing in a more effective way. Maybe we're not right for that agent's current list, but there's an agent we haven't submitted to yet who is going to champion us 100%. Maybe the book hasn't found a home because it's too niche, but we can reach our market more effectively by self-publishing. 

On the other hand....

Sometimes the rejection happens because the writing isn't ready or the story isn't as strong as it could be or the novel is missing that extra something that will make it stand out. Maybe the rejection is telling us that this obstacle will be one that helps us grow--it's going to turn us into better writers and storytellers.  

When it comes to rejection, though, we just need to trust the universe (that LIFE!) is supporting us. 

Photo by Monstera

Soren Kierkegaard said: "Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards."

We're not going to fully understand the path that we're on as we experience it, and, when we're in the middle of it all, it's so easy to lose hope. 

But the universe WANTS us to succeed. 

It's working for us and it's working with us. And whether it's for our growth or because something better is headed our way, that rejection is going to be what sends us down the right path: exactly where we're meant to be. 

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~  

Your Gift To Readers

Why should I write a book?

No. The question is: why shouldn't you write a book?

Books are amazing contributions. They're a way to inspire or help other people. They teach us empathy. They transport us to other worlds.

They are a gift to those who read them.

But I'm scared. Writing a book is hard.

Yeah, writing is hard. Writing a book that resonates is even harder. But the perfect moment to sit down and do the job? That will never come. There will never be a time when fear isn't present. Our job is to act in spite of our fears--to show up and do the hard work anyway. 

Besides, it's not really about us. If we, as creators, see ourselves as a conduit of something that already demands to be birthed, well, that takes away at least some of the pressure. 

This thing--this book--it wants to be written. 

It wants you to write it.

Why?

Because it's your idea. It came to you. It chose you.

Because maybe someone out there needs your stories or the information you want to impart or your encouraging words.

Seems pretty rude to withhold that from the world, don't you think?

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~

On Creating Yourself

Lately I’ve Pondered. . . .

(from the newsletter)

“Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” —Lolly Daskal

This is a really nice reminder for us to stop looking and start doing. We are the sum of the little decisions we make every single day. If we want to be a writer, we need to sit down and write. If we want to learn French for that trip to Paris, we need to gather the necessary resources and start using them. If we want to learn to play that song, we have to put in the time and practice.

Life is not meant to be lived passively, with things happening to us—we’re supposed to go out and do all the things—to make life happen for us to the greatest degree we’re able (because yes, there is sometimes the unexpected, which forces us to recalibrate).

Even so, we will only understand the path we’ve charted when we look back on our lives—how this action led to this discovery which led to that situation—but even if life can only be fully comprehended in reverse, we were not called to this earth to remain on the sidelines.

We get to decide who or what we’re going to be. 

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~

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How to Make a Scene Move

To make your scenes move:

*Think about everything that has happened to the character up until the moment the scene takes place.

*Imagine what is going to happen to them in future scenes. 

*Determine what the character wants at that moment.

*Identify what's at stake (overall) for the character.

*Figure out what's keeping them from getting what they want.

*Consider the actions they've taken and will take: what are they doing to get what they want?

*How are the other characters reacting to these behaviors?

*Infuse the information into your narrative. 

Keep in mind that not everything in your brainstorm will make it into your story, but it's still important to know what's going on between the lines. 

Think of storytelling as an iceberg: what peeks above the water (that the reader sees) is only a small percentage of what's actually there, and the author should *always* know what's happening beneath the surface.

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~

The Time is Passing Anyway

Lately I’ve Pondered. . . .

(from the newsletter)

“Never give up on a dream just because of the time 

it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway.” 

                                                                —Earl Nightingale

When we’re caught up in the day-to-day, drowning in an endless cycle of “responsibilities” (I mean, how many loads of laundry *must* a family of four produce each week?), it’s so easy to forget that time is passing. 

When I was younger, I knew I wanted to grow up and get married, but I’m not sure I envisioned anything past that benchmark. In another year, I will be staring down 40. The time is passing, and, looking back, I am grateful I have carved out a serious writing space in the last decade. Am I exactly where I want to be? Not necessarily. Because I find as I accomplish one goal, I immediately set another. I try to raise the stakes in my expectations for myself as much as I raise them in my stories. 

There’s still so much I want to do—so much I want to learn and make happen. But all I really have is today and how I choose to spend whatever minutes I can spare for myself when I’m not staring down a pile of darks or folding towels into thirds. Writing is the dream, and the time is passing anyway.

So the point to ponder is this: what’s your dream, and what’s keeping you from making it happen?

Don’t let time run out on you. 

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~

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No Failures, Only Lessons

Lately I’ve Pondered 

(from the newsletter)

There are no failures, only lessons. We either win or we learn. 

I don’t know who to attribute this aphorism to. There are many iterations of this idea spoken by any number of influential people. 

Nelson Mandela might come closest with: “I never lose. I either win or learn.” 

It’s a worthy endeavor, I think, to reframe the “failures” we experience as lessons—ways to grow, markers to gauge improvement, milestones on our journey. Because if we try and fail at something, but we learn something new to apply to next time (in that the failure could eventually lead to a success), is it even failing? 

Really?

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~

Five Things to Remember When Setting Your Goals

 HAPPY NEW YEAR!

It's that time again!

Let's be real: 2020 was kind of a cluster. I'm holding out hope that 2021 will be better. So, if you're like me and want to accomplish all the things this year, here are five things to keep in mind:

1. Write the Goals Down

It's proven that just in writing your goals down, you're more likely to accomplish them. Make a list and keep it handy. (But don't overload yourself. Limit your list to the three to ten things you MOST want to accomplish.)

2. Make them Specific

Don't just say you want to "read more" or "write more." Write down how many books you want to read a week. Determine how many words you want to write a day, and which story (or stories) you want to write.

3. Create a Plan and Set Deadlines

What will it take to read a certain number of books in a year? Trips to the library? Penciling "reading time" into your schedule? If I wanted to read six books a month, that's one book every five days. With due dates, that's two individual trips to the library. The first and fifteenth could be designated library days. I could find a quiet place and read for thirty minutes after dinner every evening. . . . 

Get an action plan together.

4. Get Out of the Way

I fully believe that we are in control of our own destiny. I'm not a fan of assigning blame or even letting past events or situations affect our today and tomorrow. Don't sabotage your goals with a negative mindset. 

Believe in yourself.

And that voice in your head that says you can't? He's a liar. Tell him to shut the hell up. 

5. Remember WHY These Goals Were Set

Maybe it's to become more well-rounded. Maybe it's to step outside of a comfort zone. The "why" is just as important as the "what" and "how." This is what you will return to when the road gets tough. 

So . . . what do you want to accomplish in 2021?

Your goals don't have to be reading or writing-related, either. Make this the year you get healthy--both physically and spiritually. Make this the year you save for that trip. Learn that language. Work for that promotion. Make that career change. Go back to school.

Step into your "discomfort" zone. 

Live intentionally.

Figure out what matters most to you and make those tough decisions (if necessary). 

Get moving.

And, as always: Be Brilliant!

~Katie~

A Writer's Superpower

Dear Writer,

Your self-conscious, overthinking, over-analyzing brain is your Superpower.

You are an introvert, yes, and you may tend toward some anxiety and obsessive behaviors. Society wants you to see this as a negative, but it's not. You have a rich, inner life that allows you to do what you do. 

It's that self-consciousness and over-analyzing that ensures you only put out your best work at the time, and the obsession means you will go through a work again and again until it's the best you can possibly make it.

There will be gaps when you first begin--of course there will be--but the traits you consider "bad" can only be so if they're keeping you from submitting or finishing a project completely.

So write the words. Be self-conscious about them. Overthink the project. Over-analyze everything. Fix whatever bothers you about it until you are done thinking and analyzing and ready to let it go.

Use your Superpower, then share the story you've spun from nothing (your own tiny miracle) with the rest of us.

We're anxiously waiting.

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~ 

Never Too Late

lately i’ve pondered. . . .

(from the newsletter)

“I am who I am today because of the choices I made yesterday.”

It’s possible to wake up one morning and not even recognize the person we’ve become, but this change rarely happens overnight because we are a product of a hundred thousand tiny decisions made in various increments over the course of weeks, months, and years.

It’s *never* too late to amend a habit or characteristic or begin working on a new goal, but this means adjusting who you were yesterday to reflect who you want to be tomorrow, which means making even the smallest of changes today.

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~ 

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A Mismatch of Expectations

The following gem of an idea recently arrived in my inbox. I tried to think of a way to paraphrase, but it's so much better in Seth Godin's own words, and, if you're a creator of anything, I feel like you'll find this idea of a "mismatch of expectations" helpful:

"If you look at many 1 star reviews (of books, of music, of restaurants) this is precisely what you’re going to see. A mismatch of expectations. A mismatch that is blamed, completely, on the person who created the work, not the critic.

It doesn’t matter that the thing was clearly marked. It doesn’t matter that the thing was extraordinarily well-produced. And it doesn’t matter if just about everyone else experiencing it was thoroughly delighted."

You can either pander to the middle, putting everything in exactly the category they hoped for and challenging no expectations… Or you can do the incredibly hard work of transgressing genres, challenging expectations and seeking out the few people who want to experience something that matters, instead of something that’s merely safe."

-Seth Godin-          

So be your brilliant self. Don't pander to the middle. Your audience is out there--the ones whose expectations you'll meet (and exceed) every time--and these are the ones who matter. 

~Katie~

Do the Work

lately i’ve pondered. . . . 

(from the newsletter)

A tweet recently went out from one of the quote feeds I follow: 

“Do your work with all your heart and you will succeed.”

What a lovely thought, right? That if we do what we love then success will inevitably follow? I’m not sure it’s fair to promise this, though. Success is never guaranteed. We hope that, of course, if we consistently show up and do the hard work we’ll be rewarded in some way, but no one promises fame, fortune, or “success” just because we’ve worked hard at something. 

Or maybe I’m looking at this from a very Westernized idea of what “success” is. Maybe it’s time to redefine “success.” Because sitting down to write a book and reaching “the end”—that, in itself, is a success. Completing the painting, learning the instrument, preparing the new dish—these are their own little successes. 

Do the work with all your heart, and you will succeed . . . by having done the work?

Not quite as pithy, but sometimes it has to be enough to just “do the work with all your heart.” Full stop. 

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~

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To All the Writer Moms. . . .

Dear Writer Mom: 

I know your life right now is one constant interruption. Little people have demands, and they begin the moment they wake up in the morning until the last bedtime story is read. And even then there is the cajoling to lie down, to be still, no more glasses of water, you just used the bathroom there’s no way you have to go again. . . . 

Your life is a marathon. You wake up every morning ready to sprint through the day (coffee is nonnegotiable). Maybe the baby will nap well. Maybe you’ll find an activity that’s exciting enough to entertain the preschooler for more than fifteen minutes. Maybe you won’t discover the school-aged children in the bathroom giving the dog’s fur a trim or the teenager after having given herself bangs in a fit of emotional angst. 

But even on the good days the time is never fully yours. There is the cooking and the cleaning up of toys scattered from one end of the house to the other and the laundry and the preparing of snack after snack after snack and the taxi service you provide, shuttling your kids from one destination to the next. 

But in the nooks and crannies of the day your mind slips to something else that brings you joy: words. So you think about your characters—what they are doing and saying in that very moment. They come alive in your mind. They speak to you and act out and you wish to God you could just sit down for fifteen minutes to get the words onto the page before they’re lost forever even though you know the moment you try someone will inevitably need your attention because you are Mom. 

Yet something burns deep within you, demanding you tell your stories, and it must be something larger than yourself because it would be so much easier to tell the Muse to go away. Leave you in peace. Come back in eighteen years when the smoke has settled. 

But it’s not that easy because you are Writer Mom, and while you live to put stories onto the page, you also live to love and care for your children, and this consumes your most productive hours of every day. It’s a monotony, sometimes, but they tell you this season won’t last forever. One day the house will be as quiet and empty and as clean as you always imagined it could be, and you will have as much time to think and write and plan and plot as needed. 

For now, Writer Mom, keep setting your alarm an hour early. Your characters are ready for you long before everyone else has started their day. And if you write by candlelight, then know that your characters will wait up for you. And if you can only write one or two paragraphs in a single session, write knowing you are still an inspiration. Do not compare your Writer Mom sprint with someone else’s Writer Mom sprint. Push away the thought that you could be doing more. You are enough. Your children need their Mom and the world needs your words. 

You can be both Writer and Mom. 

Besides, what is a more powerful example to her children than a mother working toward her own dreams and goals? 

Show us the way, Writer Mom. 

We see you.

The Creative Process

English social psychologist Graham Wallas, in his 1926 book Art of Thought, argues there are four stages to the creative process. 

Preparation 

This is an investigation stage. This is the stage where we’re gathering ideas. We’re reading, watching movies, thinking about the project, and taking notes. I liken it to the gardener who preps her soil for the growing season. It’s all of the groundwork that happens before a seed can be planted.

Incubation

The second stage may look like procrastination on the outside, but might not be. Incubation occurs when we’ve gathered the information we need and now our brains are stepping in to process and make connections. This is the stage where the seeds are planted and the gardener is watering and making sure there’s enough sunlight, but, on the surface, at least, it doesn’t look like anything is happening.

Illumination

After we’ve gathered the necessary information and our brains have finished processing it, we’ll have a flash of insight, where suddenly we know exactly what needs to happen or how to solve the problem. At this point, the seed is a plant, and it’s just pushed through the soil. The fruits of the preparation and incubation processes are visible.

Verification

The verification stage is where we bring our ideas to fruition. This takes a conscious, deliberate effort. It’s where we re-work the scene. Compose the poem. Write the article. The plant is now growing into something amazing.

What stage are you in?

They're all crucial to the process, but without verification, what was the point?

Action Required.

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~

On Waiting for Inspiration to Strike

"You don't need to wait for inspiration to write. It's easier to be inspired while writing than while not writing, so you don't need to be inspired to sit down and begin. You don't need to be 'in the mood.' I think you will benefit if you don't worry about moods: One, you will get in the habit of writing under any circumstances; two, since writing reflects your mental state, you will have a diversity of moods in your piece. The diversity will make your writing more interesting."

~Josip Novakovich~

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~ 

On Expectations

What is your character hoping will happen?

Is this clearly expressed on the page?

In a 300-page novel, there will be any number of choices for your main character to make, the results of which will comprise the plot of your story.

If we don't know what your character expects to happen or is wishing for, how will we know she's getting what she wants? How will we know when her hopes have been dashed?

Expressing our character's desires is a great way to raise the stakes in our stories.

Missing the 8 o'clock train out of the city isn't a big deal if one is coming along at 8:30 . . . unless your character has been given an ultimatum and has to be at her spouse's boss's home for a dinner party at 8:30 or he's leaving her for good.

If we don't know that, despite getting off work late (again) and getting stuck in city traffic (again), she's desperate to make that train, we're (as the reader) unlikely to feel the appropriate amount of pressure.

On the flip side, the character's actions and reactions would be very different if she was looking for a reason not to make that train.

Use your character's desires to keep your readers invested, and make sure her expectations are clearly stated so we know if she's progressing or facing setbacks. 

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~

Five Ways to Ruin Your Story

I spend a lot of time on this blog talking about what we can do right in our writing (or how to make what's not working work again).

But what about the flipside?

Whether you're writing page one or three hundred and one, here are five easy ways to ruin your story: 

1. There's no clear protagonist.

On page one we have Bob and Betty and Mildred and Flo. Bob is pissed at Mildred and she and Flo are icing out Betty, and then Ricky comes along and decks Bob for no reason at all, and Oh My God I have no idea who I'm supposed to pay attention to or even root for in this situation.

It's okay to start your story in the middle of the action; it's not okay to throw tons of information at your reader at once. If people are yelling and tossing punches on page one, it needs to be made absolutely clear that Ricky is the hero of this tale.   

2. The protagonist doesn't have a goal.

We know we should be paying attention to Ricky, but we have no clue what it is that he wants (except to punch Bob in the face). Maybe he doesn't even know . . . though wanting to know is, in fact, a goal. . . . but I digress. It should be very clear within the first few pages not only who your protagonist is, but what he's working toward. This, of course, can change as the narrative progresses, but readers subconsciously pick up a book with the resolution in mind. How will we know the story has ended if we don't know when Ricky has accomplished what he set out to do or even what, exactly, he wants to accomplish?    

3. There's no inner conflict.

Sure, Ricky is great at throwing punches, and he clearly hates Bob, but if he's the same person on page three hundred as he was on page one, then the reader is likely to feel cheated. Along with an outer conflict, there should be an inner conflict. After a litany of fight scenes, a story where Ricky hangs up his boxing gloves and turns to meditation to control his anger might be a journey worth following.  

4. The plot doesn't align with the goal.

We know about Ricky and his beef with Bob. We know he's intent on bringing Bob down. We know he has anger management issues he's trying to deal with. Now the plot (or the scenes that follow) needs to show a realistic progression from where Ricky is at present to who he's going to become. If you lose sight of the story question, the reader will be left scratching his or her head, wondering what shopping for leeks at the grocery store has to do with anything. (The answer? Nothing. Leave it out.)  

5. The character isn't believably attached to the goal.

Ricky says he wants to stop fighting with Bob, but he's made zero progress and we're moving into the final chapter of the story. Are we sure that's what he wanted? You know I love a good plot twist, but even these need to feel inevitable.

No protagonist, no goal, no conflict, irrelevant commentary, no attachment to the ultimate outcome. . . . These are five of the best ways to ruin your story for the reader. . . . 

Unless, of course, you write esoteric literary fiction. 

In that case, #$%! the rules.

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~ 

Just Start

I've said it before and I'll say it again.

I'll say it ad nauseam.

Don't wait until you're inspired to write. 

You're more likely to find inspiration once you sit down at the computer or open that notebook and put the pen to the page or fingers to the keyboard than you are maneuvering blindly about, waiting for that perfect "lightning" sentence or word or idea.

Don't wait for "the mood."

There is no mood. The mood doesn't exist.

(But if there is a "mood," again, you certainly won't find it until you sit down and begin to work.)

Put your current mood to work.

Don't know what to write? 

Start with a prompt. Start with a character. Start with a setting. Start with a list of words that you love. Start with "I don't know what to write." Fill the page if you must.

Just start.

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~