On Rejection

Rejection is the universe's way of saying there's something better out there for us--that we're worth more than whatever this thing we are pursuing has to offer right now.

For writers, a rejection could mean there's a better publishing house, a better agent, a better journal, or even a better path than the one we're currently working toward.

Maybe we didn't place in that anthology contest, but there's a literary magazine we can submit to that will showcase our writing in a more effective way. Maybe we're not right for that agent's current list, but there's an agent we haven't submitted to yet who is going to champion us 100%. Maybe the book hasn't found a home because it's too niche, but we can reach our market more effectively by self-publishing. 

On the other hand....

Sometimes the rejection happens because the writing isn't ready or the story isn't as strong as it could be or the novel is missing that extra something that will make it stand out. Maybe the rejection is telling us that this obstacle will be one that helps us grow--it's going to turn us into better writers and storytellers.  

When it comes to rejection, though, we just need to trust the universe (that LIFE!) is supporting us. 

Photo by Monstera

Soren Kierkegaard said: "Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards."

We're not going to fully understand the path that we're on as we experience it, and, when we're in the middle of it all, it's so easy to lose hope. 

But the universe WANTS us to succeed. 

It's working for us and it's working with us. And whether it's for our growth or because something better is headed our way, that rejection is going to be what sends us down the right path: exactly where we're meant to be. 

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~  

A Mismatch of Expectations

The following gem of an idea recently arrived in my inbox. I tried to think of a way to paraphrase, but it's so much better in Seth Godin's own words, and, if you're a creator of anything, I feel like you'll find this idea of a "mismatch of expectations" helpful:

"If you look at many 1 star reviews (of books, of music, of restaurants) this is precisely what you’re going to see. A mismatch of expectations. A mismatch that is blamed, completely, on the person who created the work, not the critic.

It doesn’t matter that the thing was clearly marked. It doesn’t matter that the thing was extraordinarily well-produced. And it doesn’t matter if just about everyone else experiencing it was thoroughly delighted."

You can either pander to the middle, putting everything in exactly the category they hoped for and challenging no expectations… Or you can do the incredibly hard work of transgressing genres, challenging expectations and seeking out the few people who want to experience something that matters, instead of something that’s merely safe."

-Seth Godin-          

So be your brilliant self. Don't pander to the middle. Your audience is out there--the ones whose expectations you'll meet (and exceed) every time--and these are the ones who matter. 

~Katie~

On Being "Not Good Enough"

It's in our nature to assume someone (or anyone, or everyone) else is more creative than we will ever be.

But don't let your feelings of being "not good enough" stop you from doing what you want (or were meant) to do.

Practice your creativity. Show up. Do the work.

It's risky putting yourself out there, but it's worth it.

Jump, then strengthen your wings on the way down.

Above all, keep your eyes on your own paper. Your creative journey will look vastly different from the person next to you, just as his journey will look different from hers, just as hers will look different from. . . .

You get the idea. 

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~

How to Deal with Criticism

I can't take credit for these ideas--they come from Julia Cameron, who is an inspiration, by the way--but here's a nine-step process for anyone who is frequently (or who has ever been) on the receiving end of harsh words directed toward something they created.

(I'm looking at you writers, poets, painters, potters, crafters, inventors, and other Makers of Things.)

How to Deal with Criticism  

1. Go ahead and receive the criticism. Study it. Feel it. It's like diving into the deep end of the pool: immerse yourself all at once.

2. Write down everything about the criticism that bothers you (and maybe eek out a response to why).

3. Write down everything that seems useful about the criticism (and perhaps how it will help you in this and on future projects).

4. Love yourself. Go take the hot bath and eat the ice cream. Treat yourself to the massage, go for the walk, or read the book.

5. Remember that, even if the piece is bad, it's a stepping stone to bigger things. You need the ugly projects to get to the beautiful ones.

6. Look at the criticism once more. Are there deeper wounds being felt (such as from a parent, teacher, or old mentor)? Address these.

7. Write a letter to the critic. Defend your work but acknowledge what was helpful about the criticism provided. DO NOT send this letter.

8. Brainstorm your next project. Make a plan. Set a date.

9. Get back out there. Create.

Be Brilliant!

~Katie~